Tree on fire

Listen up, this the important part. Oh I am serious alright. Dead serious. In fact, you may want to write this down. Yes for real. You have a pen? Paper? Good. Here it is/ – I want a tree on fire. Did you write that down. Uh huh, I said fire. F-I-R , no I know, you know how to spell it. Good. Can you do it? Your sorry why? My god, can I be any more clear, I want a tree on fire. No I get it, you are confused. It’s a simple request though, isn’t it? But of a yes or no situation. Seems to me. So, once again, once and for all, can you provide a tree on fire? Okay, nice meeting you as well, take good care, drive safe.